Friday, April 28, 2006
will there be miracles if i believe.
for the past few months.
im like a disaster.
i thought i can overcome it.
but i guess.
it all comes back to reality.
for things. do not go the way u want.
its easy to give in to fears.
somehow.
i feel so distant from my friends.
those who i thought im close with.
im talking bout those that i take it as close. not the opp.
self-proclaimed i call.
somehow;
i got lost on the way.
or i was just simply forgotten someway.somehow.
who knows what tomorrow holds for us.
im honestly afraid.
that i will sink to the very bottom once again.
after so much.
am i to go back to hell.
no matter how lousy i feel.
i will put a smile.
but there are times.
i just feel like giving it all up.
winners nvr quit -
rather. im a loser in the first place.
i know plenty of people.
but i wld rather have friends.
who are there for you.
just one word from them.
you will be joyful once more.
because of the people u call friends.
u are able to enjoy ur days.
just like xuan's nick.
they MULITIPLY joy;
they DIVIDE ur sorrow;
they SUBTRACT unhappy past of yours;
they ADD on to your book of joyful memories to come.
will i have them all.
or will i lose them all.
will i fall back once again.
or perhaps.
im just not good enough.
the faith i had now lies in wonder;
escapism.
i cant see my way now.
BANGBANG
